7-19-21<\/p>\n
~~ A guest message by my friend Leah C Morgan, a gifted, spiritual writer whose thoughts always move me. ~~<\/strong><\/p>\n They didn\u2019t understand what he was saying, and they were afraid to ask him what he meant<\/em>.<\/p>\n This verse from Mark\u2019s Gospel is eye-opening: it exposes the faulty habits of communication we all share. The passage preceding this scripture tells us that Jesus wanted to get away from the crowd for a while, to spend time alone with his disciples, to teach them, so he kept their location quiet.<\/p>\n His plans were to set aside time for them. Teaching implies understanding.<\/p>\n But this special time apart became a one-sided conversation, Jesus talking and his friends not comprehending. And \u2013 does this sound familiar to you? \u2013 they didn\u2019t ask for clarity. Whether out of fear or timidity, they did not seek to understand.<\/p>\n Watch the difference in Jesus\u2019 methods. Immediately following this, they walked to a house where they would be staying and when they were settled, Jesus was not afraid to ask what they meant in their private conversation. \u201cWhat were you discussing out on the road<\/em>?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cBut they didn\u2019t answer, because they had been arguing about which of them was the greatest<\/em>.\u201d<\/p>\n What a difference between how Jesus communicates and how we communicate.<\/p>\n How did the disciples model communication? They avoided it:<\/p>\n \u2022They communicated out of their fear<\/em>. Don\u2019t inquire, don\u2019t seek understanding, don\u2019t ask questions about things that are uncomfortable to talk about.<\/p>\n \u2022They communicated out of their shame<\/em>. Don\u2019t respond, don\u2019t divulge details, don\u2019t answer, keep quiet about things that make you look bad.<\/p>\n How did Jesus model communication? He ran headlong into it:<\/p>\n \u2022He set aside time alone without distraction<\/em>. Away from other pressing and legitimate needs He committed to be fully present and to communicate his thoughts. He gave enough information to alleviate fear and to open the door for further discussion. Even when those closest to Him remained mute out of fear.<\/p>\n \u2022He listened when others communicated<\/em>. During their daily activities He waited for an appropriate time to bring up what he observed, and asked questions of them. Even when the closest to him remained mute out of shame.<\/p>\n Jesus healed the deaf and mute while those closest to him selectively chose too often to be both.<\/p>\n Have you ever said to those closest to you, \u201cI don\u2019t want to talk about that\u201d? It is likely then that you need<\/em> to talk about that. We continue to carry what we continue to bury.<\/p>\n Is there someone \u201cbeing Jesus\u201d to you, giving you space to ask questions and allowing an opportunity for you to give honest answers? Choose the uncomfortable now. The disciples were not able to avoid difficulties by avoiding to talk about them.<\/p>\n The disciples referenced were men. There is a culture around manhood that creates the lie: to speak is weak. Jesus dismantles this lie. It takes courage to be vulnerable. It takes incredible strength to talk about uncomfortable things. Look at His boldness, look at His honesty. Jesus is the ideal man; He both asked and answered hard questions.<\/p>\n Silence in conversation often is an effort to retain self-respect. We imagine that truthful engagement would cost us the respect we\u2019ve worked so hard to create. But the more we cling to it the more we strangle it. The paradox is the \u201cletting go.\u201d Respect is earned when people have the courage to be real… not when they master the art of silence.<\/p>\n When these men were transformed by spending time with Jesus, it empowered them to survive the worst of times they weren\u2019t prepared for. They learned to start talking about it!<\/p>\n John later wrote: \u201cI have much more to say to you, but I don\u2019t want to do it with paper and ink. For I hope to visit you soon and talk with you face to face. Then our joy will be complete<\/em>.\u201d (II John 1:12)<\/p>\n + + +<\/p>\n The disciples\u2019 reluctance to communicate \u2013 listen and speak \u2013 made them weak in the hour they needed the greatest strength. Here is a song about talking, sung by Sheri Easter. The camera also finds Jeff, her husband; and Reba Rambo, whose mother Dottie wrote this song. Taped at the Cove, Billy Graham\u2019s retreat center.<\/p>\n