Monday Morning Music Ministry

6-16-25

I reluctantly admit that not all holidays, I mean all secular holidays and some hyped-up religious days, are conspiracies hatched by Hallmark Cards, used-car lots, and mattress stores. That paranoiac complaint is frequently aired here, and is partly justified. As I don’t really want to rob children of their belief, or reliance, on Santa Clauses and candy-bearing bunnies, neither can I condemn days that are earmarked to honor mothers and fathers.

We all have fathers and mothers, so there is no danger of exclusions, nor ought there be. Properly observed, I have always thought – at least since I became a father myself – we should pause and meditate on sons and daughters too: we are fathers, after all.

Father’s Day should not just honor somebody who is listed on a time-chart or family tree. There is a temptation to dip into the Well of Sentiment, and remember Dad for this event or that act. For faithfulness and, perhaps, a life of sacrifice to be that responsible Head of Household. For his devotion, example, and his love. Fathers are the recipients of uncountable fathers before them: values, standards, and traditions. And they are the architects of your life, and what you pass on… to the future fathers and mothers they will be.

We need to remind ourselves and be reminded – what better day than Father’s Day? – that God Almighty ordained marriage. That the institution of fatherhood is sacred. That by His design, the father is head of the family, that wives “submit” in the degree that husbands love and honor their wives “as Christ loved the Church.” Fathers and mothers are charged and commended in Scripture, but, significantly, the institutions of fatherhood and motherhood clearly are too. 

A big difference, no? It is the difference between saying some man is generally a good leader, and some man being a good general. Solomon, or Lincoln, would have said that better, but you will get my point.

Points can get muddied. There are examples, especially and unfortunately in these days, of fathers who are bad examples. Is the point weakened by multiple marriages, illegitimacy, abandonment, step-children, foster parents? Not really. Everyone still has a father (or father-figures) and the institution remains. With the responsibilities and legacies.

I used to tell my kids that I prayed they would follow my example and learn from lessons I shared… but occasionally I wanted to admit things, to see in me things, they should not do. Examples are examples.

And love is love.

“Honor thy father and thy mother” is a command, not a suggestion, of God. In the same way God loves His children. What is the holiday for that? Easter? Yes… Oh. Good Friday too. Um, don’t forget Christmas. Actually, every day of the year is a proper time to remember how God loved us. Every hour, really. …every moment, waking or sleeping.

My earthly father has been dead for almost 30 years. But I still think of him every day. When I finish writing an article or a chapter of a book, I wonder how he would react to it. When I discover some new piece of classical music, I imagine our discussion. When news breaks, I anticipate our debate over it. The same, to be sure, about my mother, but over other triggers. This is well and good. We are all parts of continuums, and should be. “No man is an island,” said John Donne.

Resorting to another cliché (which device would not exist if not basically true!) I maintain that Every Day is Father’s Day.

This blog’s Webmaster, Norm Carlevato, is scurrying to Nevada to meet his new Great-Grandson… on Father’s Day! How appropriate. I visited my own son Ted in Washington DC last weekend, jumping the gun a bit. My friend Gordon Pennington just visited his father in Miami for his 100th birthday, wow. On the day I write this, my wife Mickey received the news that her son has proposed to his girlfriend; another father-in-waiting! Things like jobs and homes and projects come and go – certainly important in the moments. But, writing today as a son and as a father, I can testify that nothing is as important in this life as the bond of father and son.

Our Father, who art in Heaven, said so…

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Today’s music vid is not a Gospel song per se but a tender love-note in the form of a song by the great Steve Goodman about his “Old Man.”

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My Old Man